Our gardeing attempts/a mouse in the house

 It has been about a month since I took these pictures so I could write this post.  What took so long?  In that time we had to little field mice get into our house.  I have spent a lot of time cleaning floors, toys, and really everything that a mouse could have touched.  This week I tackled the kitchen, which initially had no evidence of mice, and found a bit in those cupboards that don't hold food.  Then I went to my baking stuff, which I haven't used lately and threw away more powdered sugar and other items that I want to think about.  It has been a tiring and stress filled few weeks.  So blogging has been on the back burner of my mind, while I tried to keep completely OCD Marissa from coming out  again. 

However, this was my relaxing break during the mess.  Pictured above is my tomato plant, next week I will show you how much it has grown.  Pretty amazing.  You may also notice the drip line running by.  We put in a complete drip system the beginning of April, which is fairly awesome and allowed us to be gone for a weekend without worrying about the garden. 

 I have four strawberry plants right now and they are starting to put on berries.  Yum! 

I had to add a little flowering color to the yard too, otherwise it just wouldn't be me. 

This rosemary plant had outgrown its pot and looked a bit pitiful, it still looks a little pitiful.....

Tarragon, one of my favorite herbs.

Lemon thyme

This one and the next picture are lemon balm and bee balm, can't remember which is which.

Apples, Apples, and more Apples.  Our tree can't support the number of apples it put on, so I have had to pick off quite a bit and may have to come up with some supports for the remaining apples.  They look yummy though!

Black beans and I think the kids threw in a sunflower on the side.....

The grapevines we planted last year are growing and this bigger one has soooooo many bunches starting on it. 

this is a smaller one that I did not expect to come back, but it did.

This is my biggest grapevine, it has doubled in size since this picture. 

This one has also doubled since the picture. 

Don't forget about my peaches, they are beginning to ripen. 

I have purchased two new petunias that I put in pots on the other side of the yard.  This little guy popping up between the tile and raised bed is a self-starter.  It is from the plant I have that is at least two years old.  I have snapdragons and petunias popping up in lots of strange places because of all the flowers I had everywhere. 

My roses are also doing well this year.  

Overall, I am happy so far this year  The only issue we are having is with the cucumber and lettuce.  Every time I have some growing up past a half inch it gets eaten by something unknown as of right now.  More next week, I hope!

Things I think about when having to drive for an hour and a half on Saturday

Today was the day I take my oldest L to her grandmother's house so she can visit her father.  Not my favorite thing to do.  Even though she is sometimes difficult I would rather have her home screaming at me than somewhere else, but I digress.  Today I was thinking about where I am at in life and why I am where I am. 

Woah.  Deep thought considering I have had way too little sleep, and would be quite content going back to bed right now.  I am not the best at expressing my emotions, especially to my husband.  I have reasons, most of which stem from my poor decisions regarding who I shared my heart with earlier in my life and nothing to do with him. 

I have been thinking a lot about fitness and how I sabotage myself a lot and don't do what I know I should do.  See, I have gained twenty pounds since my lowest weigh-in, and I am not really happy about this.  This past couple of weeks I have been pushing myself to get back into a groove that will help me get out of this funk.  Little l is finally old enough that she will let me exercise and I won't have to run all over making sure she is okay, so I have been able to exercise during the day when I normally wouldn't have been able to.  She is not napping, so nap time is a thing of the past in our home. 

Overall though, even with the gain, I am still healthier than I have been in a long time, maybe even ever.  I truly don't feel I would be where I am without my husband.  Not because he makes me exercise or was disappointed in me when I was not fit, neither of which are true; but, because my husband makes me aspire to be a better and more fit person.  He represents for me, things I want to be and things I know I can be. I never had the motivation to be these things before. I can only hope that I somehow inspire him to be a better person in some way as well.

This is what I was thinking about this morning, because I was thinking and hoping that when my children start looking for a mate to share their life with, that they too will be smart about who they choose and will pick someone who not only causes them to be a better person, but who is a better person for being with my daughter.  It only took me until my thirties to realize that this is how you should truly choose a life mate, but I did, and I am grateful today for my husband, who I love more than I am able to express most days. In the meantime, I will work on expressing my feelings a little more, but maybe not today......

Spring-like, two-three weeks ago

I have been meaning to post updates on my gardening attempts, but life is crazy sometimes and that is that. 

Also, I have had the parts and pieces to put a drip system in but it has taken us about three months to get around to actually doing anything.  Pitiful, but like I said, life is crazy sometimes and that is that.  The drip system is still being worked on, but should be completed in a week or two, or at least completed to the point where I can easily add a plant here or there. 

The fun thing is that the plants from last year are coming back strong!  I will have more pictures soon!

Periwinkle

Petunias.  This is an old plant I have kept it alive for a very long time!

Apple Blossoms.  The tree was loaded, I am going to have to pinch off some of the small fruits because they branches are not mature enough to handle it all!

Peach Blossoms

Peach Blossom

Improved Yogurt Making

I love my own homemade yogurt.  I find it is not as bitter as the plain Greek yogurt you buy at the stores.  It is also super easy.  You warm up your milk, let it cool, add your old yogurt or starter, put it in the Yogotherm, wait and viola!  YOGURT!  I then strain it so that it is Greek yogurt and eat away!

This is my new yogurt maker.  It is called a Yogotherm and it is basically an insulated bucket, that holds a smaller bucket with the yogurt.  I can make 1/2 gallon of milk in to yogurt at one time, so it makes more than a few days worth of Greek yogurt.  Pictured is my finished yogurt after it is strained.  I am usually able to get 3-4 cups of whey off the yogurt.  Yummy!  I just need a new strainer, because my old one has too many holes in it.

Happy Birthday Dress

My girls picked out some fabric the last time we were at the fabric store and I decided it would be good to have them done by their birthdays.  Which of course meant that two weeks before little l's birthday I was in a rush to finish the dress!

I decided to make the Los Feliz dress from this book.

One down one more to go!

Hair Detangler

My children have and had long hair.  The oldest has hair to the middle of her back.  The youngest had a haircut because she won't let me comb it and it is now about chin-length.  However, they both have very fine hair, which equals a LOT of tangles no matter the length. 

I don't really like the natural pre-prepared detanglers you can buy.  They don't work as well as I would like.  So I happened across a facebook post and thought I would try it. 

DIY Hair Detangling Spray.  It was awesome and easy, but I will say the Marshmallow root makes it a bit messy.  I don't know if I didn't strain it enough or what, but we use it with a towel under her hair and on my legs so we don't get messy.  I used the conditioner pictured the first time, and then switched to California Baby Super Sensitive for the second batch.  The second batch was even better.  I did use a little extra conditioner in the second batch because we have MAJOR tangles most days and I still can't get little l to let me comb her hair everyday, but I guess it will come eventually. 

Nice untangled hair

Simple ingredients

Body Image

My weight loss struggle is still ongoing.  At this point, while I stress over the 15 pounds I have gained, I mostly stress about my inability to see myself as I truly am.  I know I am not thin, but I also know that I am still within the healthy weight limits for my height.  I know that I look okay, because I see pictures of myself.  What amazes me is that when I look in the mirror I do not see what is in the picture.

Where is the disconnect?  Why is this important?  Not only do I want to work through this for my own self-esteem, I also want to figure this out so that my children do not have this same disconnect.  I am sure that part of this is based on the false images we are inundated with by the media.  How do you combat that?  Apart from simply avoiding all images, which is impossible unless you have everything delivered to your home, never leave, and don't watch movies, tv, etc; you can't avoid it.

Attempting to change the media or support organizations that do is one way to feel empowered regarding the crazy way the media treats beauty both for men and women.  It also feels as though we are having changes that are slow to happen.  It still however, does not change how I see myself, and how I am critical of my own body.

I don't really know how to fix this, but I truly hope that my daughters find value in themselves outside of their looks, because there is so much more to them and my oldest is edging closer to the edge when as a girl her self-esteem is likely to dip.  In the meantime, for myself I guess I won't look in the mirror I will just look at pictures of myself (of course those are few and far between). 

Our new method of travel

Little l and I have taken to the streets.  My husband "kind of" fixed my bike, enough that I can ride it.  We purchased a new bike trailer on clearance for the little one to ride in and we are having adventures! 

I found out a couple months ago that I have a tear in the whatever part of my hip.  So running is not such a good exercise and we were run/walking to the park every week.  Now we are going to the park multiple times a week, riding to dance class, and packing up for morning adventures.  That is until it gets too hot, but for now it is nice and a great way to not worry about what I should be doing on the computer or at home and just focus on this little one who is growing so fast.  I am also becoming more fit.  The only downside so far is that bicycling makes me HUNGRY, I mean REALLY HUNGRY!  So the caloric intake versus output has been an issue, but I am sure I will somehow find a happy medium. 

Guest Blogging

So a couple weekends ago I got free tickets to a play in return for a review. It was my second time seeing this production of The Velveteen Rabbit.  

Here is a link to my review. If you live in the Phoenix area and have kids I highly recommend Childsplay. They are a wonderful organization. 

http://mom2mom.childsplayaz.org/2013/12/17/marissa-reviews-the-velveteen-rabbit/

Holiday Presents--Vanilla Extract

My vanilla extract is looking beautiful, so I decided this weekend it was time to label the jars.  Remember this is super easy.  Place two vanilla beans, slit open inside the jar, fill with vodka and wait.  The longer you wait to use the more the vanilla infuses the vodka.  

The only downside is you feel like a lush buying so much vodka!

If you get any of these posts for the holiday's act surprised and gush over how much work I put in to your gift please!

Holiday Presents-Chocolate Lip Gloss

My first attempt at lip gloss was a LONG time ago and it wasn't the best.  This time it turned out a bit better.  We tried the Chocolate Lip Gloss recipe.  

I used the recipe from the book Natural Beauty for All Season by Janice Cox which is now available on Kindle.  LOVE THIS BOOK!  

Ingredients:

Cocoa Butter

Coconut Oil

Vitamin E

Chocolate Chips

At first I didn't think this stuff was going to set, now I am worried that it will just keep getting harder. As of two days after making it, it has firmed up and is still spreadable, assuming your hands are warm.  It feels and smells good.  

This was a great recipe (so far!).

I multiplied the recipe by 8 and ended up with these four one ounce jars filled.  

Holiday Presents-Body Butter

This year I am trying to give more homemade gifts.  I decided that I have finally gotten good enough at body butter to give it away.  I would love to share the recipe with you....but I don't really measure.  Here is what I do.  I take a jar of shea butter, about 7 ounces, a bit of coconut oil, maybe 4-5 ounces and avocado oil, about a cup or so.  I put in about three tablespoons of beeswax (I use the little pastilles, they melt faster).  I put all of this in my double boiler until everything is melted.  Then I take the whole thing and stick it in the fridge for a couple of hours.  Take it out, scrape the sides and bottom so that you are mixing everything, add 10-15 drops of essential oil and mix on medium for a couple minutes.  Lately we have been using spearmint EO.  I find it to be relaxing.  

Want to find avocado oil?  Look at Costco.  Avocado is not on the dirty dozen list so I don't buy it organic.  They have a large jar at Costco.  I still haven't cooked with it as I mostly use it for skin products.

That recipe filled these jars and one of my bigger 1/2 liter jars, which are the ones we use at home.  Usually the big jar will last about one month for me.  Big L has her own big jar and little l has a little jar.  Apply sparingly. Mine absorbs fairly quickly, but I have DRY skin.   The husband of mine has great NON-DRY skin so he doesn't use it.  The rest of us need help!

My first attempt at candle making....

Sometimes I wonder why I feel compelled to try and make all of the things I try to make.  Really, it would be easier to go and buy a candle!  However, with these I know there is nothing yucky in them and they supposedly help to clean the air, so I gave it a shot.

First of all I had to find another blogger who had done this.  I did this at Mommypotamus.  Then I ordered up more beeswax, coconut oil and wick material.  I used #1/0 square wick, and the old mason jars I don't use for canning since I switch to Weck Jars to can food.  They worked out great for my candles.

 See that mess?  That is what happens when you try to pour directly from the double boiler.  I recommend putting into another jar or something with a pour spout.

Definitely follow directions.  Pour in a big, let the wick set then pour in more, then your wick stays in the middle.  She did not use anything to hold the wick to the bottom and I wish I had.  I fought a lot getting that wick to stay in the middle and to not pull it out when I straightened the wick as I added wax.

Finished product on the right.  On the left, proof that I wasted a lot of wax by spilling it.  Next time I need to do a little more research about how to not loose as much wax to cooling.  My bowl had a nice layer of cooled wax in it almost immediately (at least that was what it seemed like).

When I run out of the big jars I am only going to use the smaller jam jars.  They were easier to deal with when it came to the wick.

I am burning one of my candles right now and I am quite happy.  It is not burning too quickly.  It isn't "scented", but it has a nice clean scent to it in my opinion.

Anyone have suggestions for my next attempt?

Shaped bags

So the serger definitely won this round. It needs to go in and be fixed.  These bags would have looked better serged, but they look okay in my opinion.  

they were easy to make and I still used the tutorial and pattern in the Craftsy beginner serger class.  If you have not used Craftsy yet I recommend it.  I find it to be an easy way to take a class despite children. It is also relatively inexpensive. 

Here are my pretty bags.  For these three I used a stiffer fusible fleece.  They hold their shape better than the first one.  

I am SPOILED

First of all I want to acknowledge how fortunate I am.  I know, I am.  I have more than I need and most of what I want.  I have all of my holiday shopping done by Thanksgiving, unless it is an Apple product I need and then I wait for their once a year sale.  My husband is not me.  He actually braved the black friday shopping at our local target to procure for me an iPad air.  I have wanted an iPad for quite some time.  It wasn't until my children, yes both of them, started using the computer that I realized what a pain it was to actually get my own work done.  Since I am an APPLE person, no pc junk in my world, it was important to me that I have an iPad.  I could have had a table sooner I am sure if I had been okay with a PC model. 

I am not however okay with it not being Mac.  I use a Mac, iPhone and now iPad.  You know what is awesome about that?  If I save to the cloud, which I have been a part of since it was me.com, I can work on something on either platform.  My calendar automatically syncs no matter which device I enter the event on, and now with the iPad, I won't have connectivity and Keynote issues when giving a presentation.  That is right, I can access my keynote presentation from the computer on my iPad.  I can even modify it! 

Like I said, I am spoiled, but I am hoping this spoiling will also let me blog more, as I can edit pictures and post a blog post from my new toy as well. 

All I can say is thank goodness the man didn't make me wait until the holiday!

This brings me to one final promotion, and no I am not getting paid for this.  I have been handwriting menus for quite some time now.  It gets old and it is hard to start and stop, switch rooms and move as necessitated by the little one.  This month I started using a website called Plan To Eat.  IT IS AWESOME.  You enter your recipes, or find them online, then plop them on the planner on the day you want to make them.  Then joy of JOYS this program creates your shopping list.  Plus side is I can do this on the computer or iPad.  For my recipe I just prop it up in the kitchen and there it is, no searching time required.  LOVE IT!  You do have to subscribe, but they also have a free trial so you can try it out.  Now to just get myself to really plan all the meals, that would help me keep tack of what eat. 

The serger won

My grandmother gave me her serger earlier this year.   Until a week or so ago it has sat looking at me.  I decided it was time to take that beginner serger class I bough on craftsy so this holiday weekend I tried,  and tried and tried.

The serger had other ideas.  I have broken four needles, one is missing in my room somewhere, waiting to be stepped on in the middle of the night.  I have threaded and re-threaded the machine and I am now a pro at that step. I just can't get it to work right,  at all.  It worked for a few sample stitches then stopped. I am sure it is me and not the machine, but I don't have the patience or time right now to figure it out.  So I started this project with the serger, note the crappy stitching by the zipper.  Then I finished  it with my trusty sewing machine.

No more strawberry jam

Last week marked a sad moment in our home.  We finished off the last of our homemade strawberry jam.  It was a sad day, followed by a trip to Costco to get some organic strawberry spread, because we really need our strawberry jam!

Next year I think I will need to make four to five batches to have enough for a year.  It sounds exhausting, but I think it will be TOTALLY worth it!

My sad empty strawberry jam jar

An almost tree skirt

I started this tree skirt a bit ago.  It went together quickly and I was ready to quilt it, then life happened. 

Finally, this weekend I finished quilting it.  I still have to bind the edges, but I am a bit nervous it won't be big enough for our tree so I am going to wait until this weekend when we put up the tree. 

 I started with gold thread, but it must be too old because it kept breaking.  A lot of breaking.  So I gave up on the gold and switched to green. 

I am getting a little better at free motion quilting, but it can be exhausting!  In the end it worked out pretty well. 

Weight Struggles are Life Long-Don't forget

If you read the blog (which I know there are like, 10 of you!), you know that I recently lost a LOT of weight and made some really good healthy choices.  Well.....I had a bit of a slide down the weight gain way.

I have been beating myself up for it and getting angry about it now for a couple weeks.  I gained back 15 pounds from my lowest weigh in.  That is A LOT.  I am NOT happy.  I would like to blame the surgery, which was a part of the problem.  You see I had gotten really used to working out hard five days a week.  Hard enough that eating 1800 calories a day was not an issue, in fact it was needed.  Then I had a three week no exercise period followed by a visit to my grandmother's house.  My willpower and mental happiness level were not able to deal with all of the candy in that house. 

Once I start down the sugar train I can't stop.  It is just a huge mess.  Before all that I could eat just one or just one serving of a sweet, now I am back to being the pig I was before I lost the weight.  It is not good and I am not happy.  Did I say that already?

Also, I really DON'T want to go back on my diet.  It is NOT a fun diet to be on, it is hard and I don't want to.  I feel like a two year old....

What I need to do is stop the sugar intake.  It is going to be hard, but I threw away the kids candy and have gotten rid of all the junk in the house (mostly).   My biggest issue now will be avoiding my husband's chocolate chips. 

I am very frustrated with myself, and I have decided to try a cleanse that my friends have had luck with.  So Advocare here I come.  I am not sure what will happen, and I am not doing the 24 day challenge, I can't afford that, but I need to get rid of this sugar addiction and get back to being a normal healthy person.  Not just for my weight, but also for my mental health. 

Then I have to admit to myself that I have an issue with sugar and food.  I CANNOT be lax EVER.  I HAVE TO EXERCISE AND EAT RIGHT FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE, I CAN'T TAKE A WEEK OFF.

I am posting this picture from a year ago as a reminder of what I don't want to be again.  Just think that was me after I had already lost about 30 pounds.  Only 80 more off this picture and you have were I am today. 

eggless meatballs

I have always wanted to make a meatball, but never have because I didn't know if it would work without egg.

Well, I decided to try anyway and VIOLA!!  It works.  I did go ahead and add some applesauce and baking powder to imitate the egg and provide some moisture.  These were VERY yummy.

 Big L in true picky fashion liked the meatballs, but didn't like the sauce on them.  She liked the sauce separate, but not together.  OY!  Next time I will leave her meatballs out of the sauce.  To me it added some flavor and I liked it.  Now you know a meat ball will still remain a ball even without an egg!  YEAH!!