Thursday, June 13, 2013


Another big motivator in my desire to lose weight was the HOPE (nay, the absolute faith) that my breast size would decrease.  Seriously, having big heavy boobs is about as exciting as being nauseated all the time.

My weight loss doctor told me, "Women pay big money to have those."  Implying that I should be happy.  Well, I am not happy.  My neck, shoulder, upper back and chest muscles hurt all the time.  Sometimes the pain is so severe that I want to cry.  Sometimes the only way to relax them is to lay down and hope that little l doesn't get in to anything she shouldn't get in to.

I thought that buying new bras fitted properly would help, but so far (almost a week in to wearing them) I am still in pain.  I am giving it another week, then I am going to my doctor.  I hate surgery and would not normally want to have surgery, but this just sucks.  I feel good, I want to exercise, and yet when I do it can make the pain worse, even with a sports bra on that reduces movement to a minimum.  As the lovely woman at Dillard's who helped me find bras that fit told me, some women just have a lot of breast tissue.  I think that genetics and breast feeding have led me to a point where I am probably just stuck with what I have.  The fat content is low in other words.

If the bras are not making a huge difference by the end of another week, I am going to the doctor to talk breast reduction.  (note, if I state something more than once I am more likely to do it) I have mixed feelings about this though.  While I think I would feel free being smaller, what if I miss them?  I have been a C or larger since high school.  On the other hand, running would be nice, and it is currently painful.  I would also get to wear those cute tops that I don't normally fit in.  I think the positives outweigh the negatives, but what if I am forgetting something?

This was not a challenge I foresaw, I honestly thought they would shrink just like the rest of me.  Oh well, on to the next challenge, onward and upward. 

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