Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Mother's Intuition-Asthma

Little l has been coughing.  I think since Sunday, but time is difficult for me. 

I know the cough, truly I do.  I get it, Big L gets it.  It is a particular kind of cough that I was hoping little l would not have, but there it is.  Being a panicky mother I took her to the doctor yesterday, and much to my dismay she confirmed what I thought.  Little l is pulling hard to breathe, and likely has asthma.  While I like to pretend this is not a big deal, and it is nothing we can't handle, it kind of is.  I can handle it no problem.  I can give her a normal life and make it so that she can do whatever she wants, no problem.  We have an excellent allergy, immunologist, asthma doctor that has been treating big L since she was nine months old.  All of that I can deal with. 

I just feel a little guilty at times that both of my children developed this and it is because of my genes.  Not something I can control, I know, but still, it is a big deal to me.

I also felt bad yesterday because I don't seem to trust myself.  I knew the cough for what it was the first night she had it.  I was just hoping it would go away.  I also doubted myself, thinking, well it is just a cold.  The same thing happened last week with big L.  She fell and had a very bad (read would not stop bleeding) scrape on her chin, plus scrapes on her shoulder and knees.  I didn't think she needed stitches, but couldn't stop second guessing myself, so I took her to urgent care. 

I realize it will take some time for me to trust my instincts after big L's father, but this is getting a little ridiculous!  Any ideas?

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