Thursday, November 14, 2013

Parking Lot Blow Ups

Yesterday was grocery day for us.  Little l and I dropped off big L at dance and ran to the store, almost literally, we have one hour to shop, get the groceries home in the fridge and get back to take big L from dance to TKD.  CRAZY!!!!!

It works though and we did it.

When we were in the parking lot loading up the car we were witness to a complete melt down/blow up by a woman.  She had been sitting in her car and someone pulled up next to her.  While getting out this man bumped her car with his car door.  It happens right?  More than we like to admit, it happens.  The man did not intend to hit her car from what I could see, nor was it a hard enough hit for me to hear it from the next lane over, but this woman LOST it.

The couple she started screaming at was older, not old, but around my parents age.  Old enough that in my mind respect should be given until it isn't deserved (though I guess that applies in my mind despite the age).  She wouldn't stop though, and the man even tried showing that the damage she was pointing to couldn't have been caused by his door.  To no avail, she paced and yelled and tried to pull other people in to the situation.  Some people went up to look at what she was yelling about and most walked away unimpressed by the "damage".

At first, I wanted to go tell her to calm down it was just a car, but I paused.  I began to think of scenarios where this "DIVA" (her term not mine, this was on her license plate) may have just cause to behave in this manner.  Perhaps she had saved for years and finally been able to buy this car after years of driving a beater and wham this guy hits her in the parking lot and her perfect car was blemished.

Maybe this wasn't about the car, maybe she just found out her parent is dying, or lost her job at work. I don't know.  It could all be crap, and she could just be mean.

What I did take away from this, is that we should all be aware of how our behavior appears to others. I was not sympathetic to her, and I didn't see much sympathy from anyone else either.  She appeared petty and cruel.  She may have had her reasons and not been in full control of her reactions, but she was not presenting her argument properly.

I had a moment a few weeks ago when the same thing happened.  I was more like the screaming lady than I care to admit.  Only difference being mine wasn't in public.  Sometimes changing how you react to a situation is the best way to effectively deal with it.  While I still bristle over the situation I am dealing with and I am frustrated to no end, I am changing the way I approach it.  If after this change I still can't get it to work it will be time for some outside mediation.

We will see.....Just my thoughts though, during this supposedly thankful season perhaps we should go out of our way to be kinder to one another and instead of blowing up over accidents be more accepting of apologies when no malice was present.  An accident is just that, an accident.

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